Thursday, August 19, 2010

Things That I Wish I Had The Nads To Say...

1. You have something in your teeth. It's been there since last week.

2. Stay out of my personal space. When you get too close to me I feel very stabby.

3. Stop letting someone else define who you are. It's very unattractive.

4. Leave him.

5. Treat your children as if they were precious not disposable.

6. I hate you so much that I can't even look at your car without throwing up in my mouth a little.

7. I don't want to act my age.

8. I hate that I can hate someone.

9. I would rather chew glass than eat your cooking.

10. I know you pooped in my bathroom and used all the toilet paper.

Thursday, August 12, 2010

Who Doesn't LOVE The Beginning Of A New School Year?!? Um...ME.

I came to the realization the other day that school is about to resume. Where in the hizzle did the summer go?! This means that I'm going to have to wake up AT LEAST an hour earlier to get myself and my little love muffin ready and out the door in time.

I'm talking about my daughter, y'all...The Detective has been dressing himself on his own for years now.

My sweet princess is not much of a "sweet princess" in the morning either. I think she gets that from me because I can be quite a dragon in the wee hours of the start of a new day. Hard to believe, I know. Our mornings during the school year go something like this:

Me: (to my bundle of joy) "Wakey, wakey shaky bakey!"

Meg: *grumble*

Me: "Time to go to school! Yay! Let's not be late, sweetie!" *shaking Meg gently*

Meg: *her eyes fly open and glow red for a second just prior to screaming* "I DON'T WANT TO GO TO SCHOOL! I'm tired..."

Me: "C'mon Meg! Get up and get dressed! We're late!"

Meg: *growling* "NO!" *squirmflipfalloutofbedflop*

Me: *pulling pajamas off Meg* "Yes...you...are...going...now get over here and get dressed NOW!"

At this point I'm sweating and my work clothes are wrinkled. Most times I have a run in my stockings also. Megan is dressed though so SCORE!

Like the pack mule that I am, I deposit everything needed for her day and mine in the car. I get her hooked up and as I'm pulling out of the driveway she says:

"I have to go potty!"

Awesome. I love school.

Thursday, August 5, 2010

Operation Beautiful

A wonderful friend of mine shared this idea and link with me today: Operation Beautiful. The tag line reads:

"Transforming the way you see yourself one post-it note at a time."

I love this idea so much that I had to share it with as many people as I could! You know I immediately threw a pen and a pad of post-it notes in my purse to do this. That's just how I roll, people. Here is an example of a note left in a random spot:

Who doesn't adore compliments?

The one place that I've decided against posting them is in or on a bathroom stall. I am ALL ABOUT making people smile but if I'm riding the porcelain throne; I don't want to see a note that screams "YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL! YOU CAN DO IT! BELIEVE IN YOURSELF!" while I'm dropping the kids off at the pool. Know what I mean?