Yesterday was a beautiful day. It was a perfect day to sit on the back deck, open a frosty beer and heckle the people walking by on the trail behind my house. It was not a beautiful day to go running. But guess what the heck I did? I went running. O to the M to the G. What was I thinking? It was 80 degrees out, full sun, no breeze and I'm not what one would call a "strong runner" or a "happy runner"...you get the picture. I sweat and whine. A lot.
I get home from work and I get suited up with the proper running capris, tank and-this is the part where everything started to go terribly wrong-a new sports bra. You see, I have 1 sports bra that keeps my throw pillows from flopping about-and everyone knows that "flopping" is the number one cause of running injuries, right? I had planned a short run and I didn't really think that a new sports bra would make much of a difference. Now I know that I was terribly, horribly, ridiculously WRONG. Oh, and I forgot to put a few swipes of Body Glide on the inside of my thighs because "there's just no way that they'll burst into flames on such a short run. Ha. Ha. He. Ho. Ha." Look at me, I'm an idiot.
After the first mile I was hurting a bit. Actually, I was hurting a lot and I kept telling myself to just push through it...fight the power and all that inspirational BS. Coming into my second mile is when I started to feel the tingle of 9th degree burns along the straps of my sports bra. Um, ouch. Then it actually started to IGNITE. I felt like every time I swung my arms that my skin was being dragged across sand paper and doused with lemon juice and a pinch of salt just to add insult to injury. Just as I started to realize that the pain around my arms was not getting any better the inside of my thighs started to sizzle. And by "sizzle" I mean "catch on fire". Oh my.
The good thing about this was that I forgot about the pain from my shins. Another good thing that I learned was that I will NEVER go for any length of run EVER again without Body Glide and a sports bra that fits me well. The bad thing? My inner thighs and my underarm area looked like I had some mutated form of leprosy. I'm a disgusting specimen of womanhood. Avert your eyes.
I get home from work and I get suited up with the proper running capris, tank and-this is the part where everything started to go terribly wrong-a new sports bra. You see, I have 1 sports bra that keeps my throw pillows from flopping about-and everyone knows that "flopping" is the number one cause of running injuries, right? I had planned a short run and I didn't really think that a new sports bra would make much of a difference. Now I know that I was terribly, horribly, ridiculously WRONG. Oh, and I forgot to put a few swipes of Body Glide on the inside of my thighs because "there's just no way that they'll burst into flames on such a short run. Ha. Ha. He. Ho. Ha." Look at me, I'm an idiot.
After the first mile I was hurting a bit. Actually, I was hurting a lot and I kept telling myself to just push through it...fight the power and all that inspirational BS. Coming into my second mile is when I started to feel the tingle of 9th degree burns along the straps of my sports bra. Um, ouch. Then it actually started to IGNITE. I felt like every time I swung my arms that my skin was being dragged across sand paper and doused with lemon juice and a pinch of salt just to add insult to injury. Just as I started to realize that the pain around my arms was not getting any better the inside of my thighs started to sizzle. And by "sizzle" I mean "catch on fire". Oh my.
The good thing about this was that I forgot about the pain from my shins. Another good thing that I learned was that I will NEVER go for any length of run EVER again without Body Glide and a sports bra that fits me well. The bad thing? My inner thighs and my underarm area looked like I had some mutated form of leprosy. I'm a disgusting specimen of womanhood. Avert your eyes.
